'Some of us are poor': What to do when your wealthier friends want to meet up for an extravagant dinner
As friends progress through different stages of life, some might end up earning more than others. How do you maintain these friendships as your financial circumstances diverge?
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One time, when discussing what to eat at their next gathering, Mr Keith Lim’s friends whom he knew through National Service (NS) suggested that they meet at a posh restaurant for an expensive steak dinner.
Mr Lim, a 28-year-old research consultant who earns significantly less than his peers, responded lightheartedly: “Some of us are poor."
He then sang the song I Dreamed a Dream from the musical Les Miserables, trying to convince them to change their minds.
He knew that it would hurt his pocket more than theirs. The friend group, consisting mostly of software engineers, lawyers and doctors, started discussing cheaper options.
While he replied to his friends jokingly at the time, the matter of maintaining friendships with wealth gaps was a personal one for Mr Lim, because he had lost friends due to his own financial anxiety.
He recalled how three years ago, he opened up to an ex-schoolmate about his financial concerns while visiting her home, which was a four-storey landed property.
However, he was hurt when she dismissed his concerns by stating: “You know that money is not everything, right?”
Mr Lim said: “We are no longer in touch because I realised that our realities are too different.”
